It means choosing the unconventional path toward freedom, sobriety, and a life lived authentically. At every fork in the road, I chose to keep wondering. To wonder is to walk barefoot through the unknown, to feel the chill of mystery and the warmth of meaning in the same breath. It is the soul’s way of asking, “What else might be true?”

The forks in the road.., in other words the choices that changed my life?

Choosing freedom over stability or a conventional lifestyle didn’t feel like a choice, the choice would have been to abandon an inherited hunger for adventure. Not all neanderthals became hunter/gathers; otherwise humanity would have never left Africa.

The big three choices was to leave West Virginia in my rearview mirror, choosing life over drugs, and choosing to do the work necessary to keep my relationship with Alain for the past 33 years and counting.

The City was becoming too expensive in 1999, we couldn’t afford to by a home even with another couple. The Castro of the 70’s and 80’s was literally dead and being replaced with neo-Scandinavian architecture of modern buildings housing more and more heterosexuals. The dream, at least for me, had pivoted to a life of happiness over pain and anger. Moving to and buying a home in Palm Springs was the first step in that pivot.

I didn’t leave a good paying job, I simply followed my path towards a life lived without a promised tomorrow.

People are important. Places may change and people too; but holding on to those relationships matter. It’s our roots, not our homes, nor our jobs - it’s the people.

If you want to change everything, change everything. Don’t do it half-assed. Keep your roots growing but let you wings lift you as high as you can go.

I jump when opportunities arise while mitigating risks. Fear is normal, but it shouldn’t stop you. Consider outcomes, but don’t let fear freeze you.

I wish I had kept more friendships close and not treated people as temporary. The journey is temporary, but people matter.

Cherish your friendships. The places may be temporary, but the people will fill your life with love and joy, making every risk worth it